LeKnight at Bluewater | home
What You Don't Know
What You Don't Know
and Your Sweetie Shouldn't have to Tell You.
You know more about your favorite teams and the players than the coaches, or owners of the teams. You know more about how the game should be played, and how they can win more games than anyone. Why is the game of romance, love, sex, sexuality such an uninteresting sport to you? OR, is it fear of failure? Perhaps you seem to think it's some form of alchemy, which only the great lovers have unlocked the secrets to, and which you feel they will never share their secrets with you. Whatever the reason, having a rich sexual life is healthy, and worth the effort it takes to create. If you make it that game or sport you want to learn as much about as you can, you too will begin to realize the benefits.
It begins with passion. The passion to be the best you can be. Passion is not a faint glimmer on the horizon. Passion is passion. Whether it's for your favorite team or your sweetie. Passion is passion. What has happened is you've gotten lazy. You expect that passion just to be there. And if it's not, you do nothing. It all begins with imagination. When you first met, what delights, withal, you had secretly promised yourself, what different ways of enjoying her had you  imagined. And then you worked at making that a reality. It became an adventure, with passion. Now that you have achieved that, and with time, you have become lazy. Some men seem to think that a new lover will reignite that passion, others just give up and do nothing at all. You don't need to find a new lover, you only need to find new knowledge and skills about loving. This is not a task which should be left to others.
One thing to keep in mind. Great sex is much more than bodies rubbing delightfully together. It's also about trust, intimacy, and communications. Communications is the key to lasting intimacy.
As we human beings have changed and evolved over our thousands of years of recorded history so have our attitudes and expressions of all things sexual. The only thing that hasn't changed much is society's desire to exercise a certain amount of control over an individual's sexual behavior. Whether it be through church or state, educational institutions or popular media of the time, there have been rules and regulations, views and taboos about what we should do sexually, how we should do it, who we should do it with and even how we should think about doing it.
Too many men and women berate themselves as lust-filled sex addicts for continually wanting to "reach out and touch someone". You can blame part of that desire on your hormones, particularly oxytocin, a peptide that causes you to want touching and makes you feel really good when you get it so that you keep wanting more. Women, because of their high estrogen levels, are especially affected by oxytocin. That's one of the reasons they like to cuddle a lot. And generally the more a woman is stroked and cuddled the more easily she'll make the shift from sensual to sexual. If you want her to happily open her legs for you, be certain to give them some tender caresses first.
It is common for passion to die in relationships not because a certain amount of time has elapsed, but because the lovers stop working at keeping the passion alive. Falling in love is something that just happens to you. That's why it is called "falling." You have no control over it. It is not something you do or are responsible for. This is wonderful (full of wonder) while it lasts, but by its very nature it stops happening to you. At that point you have a choice, look for someone new and experience the passion all over again, mostly based on the newness of the person and the circumstances, or learn how to create love and be responsible for keeping your desire alive throughout a lifetime of intimacy. This takes effort. Fortunately the effort is so richly rewarded with pleasure, excitement, surprise, and delight, that you will wonder why more people don't do it!
For great loving you've got to make time and take time. Making time for each other means having a date, only the two of you, at least once every week. No family, no friends, no business or school buddies. No phone, no fax, no modem, no pager. You set aside several hours when the focus is on you, your mate and your relationship. It's a time to nurture your love and stoke your passion. It may or may not include sexual activity but it should always be sensual, intimate and fun.
Once per season you take two days and two nights for a private get-away. You don't have to leave town to do it. You can rent a room at a local hotel, trade apartments with friends, or simply lock yourself in your own home. During these two days and nights you do things that bring you closer together in every possible way - read each other sexy stories, give each other bubble baths, feed each other exotic foods, rub your backs, tell each other how absolutely fabulous you are, make love in every corner of the house - whatever works for the two of you!
If you're still with me here and would like to continue >>> .
"I do not undertake to repair your faults, but I will take good care not to imitate them."
I will show you that there are ladies who in their quest for romance, love and orgasm
have had no other end in view than finding that.
Definitions of a FEW words we should learn to appreciate.
1. (n.) Sexual hunger:
• lust
lust n. 1. Intense or unrestrained sexual craving. 2.a. An overwhelming desire or craving. b. Intense eagerness or enthusiasm. 3. Obsolete. Pleasure; relish. --lust intr.v. lust·ed, lust·ing, lusts. To have an intense or obsessive desire, especially one that is sexual.
• concupiscence
con·cu·pis·cence n. A strong desire, especially sexual desire; lust. --con·cu“pis·cent adj.
• craving
• desire
• itch
• lasciviousness
las·civ·i·ous adj. 1. Given to or expressing lust; lecherous. 2. Exciting sexual desires; salacious. --las·civ“i·ous·ly adv. --las·civ“i·ous·ness n.
• lecherousness
• lechery
• libido
• libidinousness
• lustfulness
• passion
• prurience
pru·ri·ent adj. 1. Inordinately interested in matters of sex; lascivious. 2.a. Characterized by an inordinate interest in sex. b. Arousing or appealing to an inordinate interest in sex. --pru“ri·ence or pru“ri·en·cy n. --pru“ri·ent·ly adv.
• salaciousness
sa·la·cious adj. 1. Appealing to or stimulating sexual desire; lascivious. 2. Lustful; bawdy. --sa·la“cious·ly adv. --sa·la“cious·ness or sa·lac“i·ty (s…-l²s“¹-t¶) n.
• the hots (US)
Sensual adj. Of, relating to, or concerned with sensory gratification:
• hedonistic
he·don·ism n. 1. Pursuit of or devotion to pleasure, especially to the pleasures of the senses. 2. Philosophy. The ethical doctrine holding that only what is pleasant or has pleasant consequences is intrinsically good. 3. Psychology. The doctrine holding that behavior is motivated by the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain. --he“don·ist n. --he”don·is“tic adj. --he”don·is“ti·cal·ly adv.
• carnal
car·nal adj. 1. Relating to the physical and especially sexual appetites. 2. Worldly or earthly; temporal. 3. Of or relating to the body or flesh; bodily. --car·nal i·ty n. --car“nal·ly adv.
• Epicurean
ep·i·cu·re·an adj. 1. Devoted to the pursuit of pleasure; fond of good food, comfort, and ease. 2. Suited to the tastes of an epicure. 3. Epicurean. Of or relating to Epicurus or Epicureanism. --ep·i·cu·re·an n. 1. A devotee to sensuous and luxurious living; an epicure. 2. Epicurean. A follower of Epicurus.
• pleasure-loving
• pleasure-seeking
• debauched
de·bauch v. de·bauched, de·bauch·ing, de·bauch·es. --tr. 1.a. To corrupt morally. b. To lead away from excellence or virtue. 2. To reduce the value, quality, or excellence of; debase. 3. Archaic. To cause to forsake allegiance. --intr. 1. To indulge in dissipation. --de·bauch n. 1. The act or a period of debauchery. 2. An orgy. --de·bauch“ed·ly adv. --de·bauch“er n.
• sensualistic
• luxuriant
• sensuous
sen·su·ous adj. 1. Of, relating to, or derived from the senses. 2. Appealing to or gratifying the senses. 3.a. Readily affected through the senses. b. Highly appreciative of the pleasures of sensation. --sen - su· os - i·ty or sen - su·ous·ness n. --sen - su·ous·ly adv.
• sybaritic
syb·a·rit·ic adj. 1. Devoted to or marked by often excessive or effete luxury. 2. Sybaritic. Of or relating to Sybaris or its people. --syb”a·rit“i·cal·ly adv.
• voluptuary
vo·lup·tu·ar·y n., pl. vo·lup·tu·ar·ies. A person whose life is given over to luxury and sensual pleasures; a sensualist. --vo·lup“tu·ar”y adj.
• voluptuous
vo·lup·tu·ous adj. 1. Giving, characterized by, or suggesting ample, unrestrained pleasure to the senses. 2.a. Devoted to or indulging in sensual pleasures. b. Directed toward or anticipating sensual pleasure. c. Arising from or contributing to the satisfaction of sensuous or sensual desires. --vo·lup“tu·ous·ly adv. --vo·lup“tu·ous·ness n.
• erotic
e·rot·ic adj. 1. Of or concerning sexual love and desire; amatory. 2. Tending to arouse sexual desire. 3. Dominated by sexual love or desire. --e·rot“ic n. --e·rot“i·cal·ly adv.
• horny (slang)
• amorous
• hot (colloquial)
• lustful
• passionate
• randy (colloquial)
• sexy (colloquial)
|